Respect in the workplace: Tips for leaders and employees

What does the word respect mean? Look it up on the Internet, and you will generate definitions such as “due regard for the feelings, wishes, rights, or traditions of others,” “recognizing the worth of a person or thing,“ and “treating everyone with dignity, appreciation, and fairness.”

A particularly significant way to grasp the meaning is to think about how you would help a child understand the concept. Kids Helpline, an online and phone counseling service for young people, explains that “respect means that you accept somebody for who they are, even when they’re different from you, or you don’t agree with them.“ It offers these examples of what mutual respect looks like:

• You feel safe being around each other.
• Each person knows it’s okay for both of you to express who you are.
• You don’t yell or talk over the top of each other.
• When you disagree, you listen to each other and be patient.
• Neither of you is controlling the other person’s choices.
• You both talk openly about your needs and wants.
• Both of you allow the other person space if they need it.
• You can both admit when you’ve made a mistake.

Respect in the workplace sounds like an excellent way to operate in a work environment, too, right?

The importance of respect in the workplace

A culture of respect in the workplace yields a variety of benefits. Employees who feel free to be themselves without fear of ridicule speak up. This results in a better range of ideas and viewpoints presented, which helps innovation and decision-making to thrive. Being heard promotes feelings of worth and a sense of belonging, contributing to job satisfaction and loyalty to the employer.

A respectful atmosphere adds to overall well-being, both individually and as a company. Stress levels go down, leading to better mental health. Productivity increases as people spend more time on collaboration and teamwork than second-guessing each other and butting heads. People enjoy being around one another (or maintaining civil relationships). Retention becomes less of a problem because employees are not looking to jump ship to a more positive work environment.

What goes on in a respectful workplace?

Exact actions differ from place to place, but the bottom line is that respectful work environments prioritize building personal feelings of trust, safety, and worth. Everyone matters, and company culture demands adopting that mindset.

Common examples of respectful workplace behavior include:

• Talking politely

Respectful communication involves using courteous language such as “please“ and “thank you.“ It avoids yelling, name-calling, cursing, or other offenses. Eye contact and positive body language contribute to a pleasant exchange.

• Active listening

Listening to engage is different from listening simply to respond. It involves trying to understand the speaker’s point of view and what they want to convey. Doing this requires full attention, so an active listener puts away the phone and concentrates. Letting the person finish speaking without interrupting is another must in respectful communication.

• Addressing concerns privately

Show respect in the workplace for team members by never calling someone out in public. Whether a mistake or a conflict occurs, deal with it behind closed doors rather than cause unnecessary embarrassment.

• Apologizing

Nobody is perfect. Owning up to one’s errors builds respect while blaming others is highly disrespectful.

• Recognizing and appreciating

Workers feel good when others tout their contributions or abilities. In a respectful environment, leaders and team members give credit where it is due and share it when warranted. They realize that acknowledging the talents and efforts of others does not take away from their own merits. Instead, it builds a positive work culture.

• Maturely disagreeing

Even in the best workplaces, people do not always get along, but they handle conflict tactfully and with an eye for resolution. They extend the courtesy of directly addressing the issue and working together toward an outcome. They refrain from spreading rumors, giving silent treatment, recruiting colleagues to take sides, and other passive-behavior actions.

• Extending consideration

People show respect when they understand that others have work to do and act accordingly. Preparing for meetings and arriving at the scheduled start saves time for other participants. Workers also try to keep noise levels and interruptions to a minimum around busy colleagues. They realize their work affects others, so they do their job and give team members a heads-up when changes or obstacles occur.

• Honoring physical boundaries

Acting respectfully includes allowing people to have their own space. An office or cubicle is an individual territory that others should not enter or remove things from without permission. Lunches are left alone in the fridge. Everyone cleans up their messes in common areas.

• Staying office-appropriate

Professionalism encourages respect. Dressing according to company policy demonstrates respect for the company’s image. Avoiding topics that are too personal in conversation respects colleagues’ privacy. Keeping jokes “clean“ prevents hurting or offending others.

• Accepting differences

People do not possess the same beliefs, preferences, or points of view. A respectful workplace culture acknowledges individuality, works to keep everyone feeling valued for who they are, and maintains a level playing field.

The role of leadership behavior in promoting respect in the workplace

Every person in the workplace plays a part in creating and maintaining a respectful environment. Leaders, however, hold a vital role. Their words and actions set the tone, and employees take cues from their behavior.

Respectful leaders listen to people’s opinions. They ask rather than assume and refrain from jumping to conclusions. Mistakes are handled calmly and treated as learning experiences. Respectful leaders also acknowledge differences of opinion and try to understand matters from another person’s perspective.

Employees often view micromanaging as a sign of disrespect. They see such behavior as a lack of trust in their abilities. Giving workers as much control over where, when, and how work assignments get done promotes mature relationships.

Team members also lose respect for managers who exhibit favoritism. In a fair environment, leaders enforce rules across the board, and the company bases advancement decisions on merit alone. Discrimination based on gender, race, and other factors does not happen.

Supervisors encourage respectful behavior outside of the office by honoring work-life balance. They do not bother their direct reports during non-business hours or on vacation. This consistency encourages those who manage to adopt the same policy.

When employees do not respect the boss

Many leaders assume that their position alone makes them worthy of respect. Employees often hold a different viewpoint. They feel managers must earn respect, not expect it.

Workers who lack respect for their manager may act in ways that demonstrate their disdain. They may gossip about their leader or try to smear the person’s reputation. Some might openly ignore or defy their boss’s instructions. Others might publicly challenge the supervisor’s competency or authority in a hostile, embarrassing way.

This type of disrespectful behavior poses several problems. Morale and productivity suffer when direct reports undermine the person in charge. Failure to stop it can appear wimpy, causing others to lose faith in their boss’s leadership skills or encourage them to engage in similar actions. Even innocent bystanders suffer, as witnessing colleagues disrespect the manager causes discomfort.

Reasons why workers do not respect a manager vary but often stem from one of the following:

• Viewing the manager as incompetent or lacking sufficient experience
• Disliking the supervisor’s managerial style
• Clashing over personal beliefs such as politics or religion (both of which should be kept out of the workplace)
• Making judgments based on age (seeing the manager as an out-of-date “dinosaur“ or a bratty “kid”), gender, sexual identity, race, culture, religion, or disability
• Clashing in the past
• Holding a grudge over something perceived as wrong or hurtful

Wise managers try to get to the root of the problem with a private discussion. They stay calm and factual but firm that the company will not tolerate insubordinate behavior. They institute their organization’s progressive discipline policies if the situation fails to improve.

Intelligent managers also examine their behavior. Don’t expect respect if guilty of unethical conduct, failure to give everyone equal opportunities, flaunting power, or lack of transparency. Likewise, if your word isn’t gold, expect your name to be mud.

Building a respectful workplace

Leaders who act respectfully toward employees set the stage for mutual respect and an overall positive work environment. Plenty of other actions, though, also can contribute.

Organizations interested in fostering respect in the workplace benefit from the following:

• Identifying respect in the workplace as a core value

Include it in your mission statement. Talk about its value during onboarding. Leave no doubt that respectful interactions are part of the organization’s modus operandi.

• Evaluating job candidates

Respectful hires enhance the staff, so look for positive signs and red flags. How does the applicant act toward the secretary or the janitor, not just those in a hiring position? Does the interviewee arrive on time or give notice if running late or canceling? Do they employ basic courtesies, such as holding doors open and using polite language? Is the person’s phone put away during the interview? Is the individual mature when talking about past employers or colleagues or quick to blame or bad-mouth them?

• Training in emotional intelligence

Emotionally intelligent people possess a better grasp of their feelings and those of others. They know how to put themselves in another’s shoes. They read social cues. All of these things promote acting in ways that build respectful relationships. While some folks are inherently stronger at soft skills than others, anyone can improve with instruction and practice.

• Recognizing differences

Celebrate diversity and strive for inclusion. Simple acts confirm that the organization respects each person’s uniqueness. Consider providing floating holidays for staff members to use as they see fit for occasions significant to their culture. When hosting events, include meatless options and non-alcoholic drinks. Offer company t-shirts in a range of sizes.

• Establishing a psychologically safe environment

Workers feel respected when those around them welcome their contributions and opinions. Leaders can make a point of explicitly asking individuals to express ideas. Team members should adopt a mindset that good ideas can come from anyone at any time, and managers must shut down those who belittle the point of view of others or instill fear about expression.

• Calling out lack of respect

Lastly, remember that silence promotes the continuation of disrespectful behavior. Leaders must quickly and effectively deal with those who disrespect others. Encourage staff members to speak up, too. When peers deliver the message that “we don’t do that around here,“ they pressure offenders to stop.

More Resources:
What does DEI mean in todays workplace
Workplace resilience: The key to thriving in challenging times
Digital age workplace: Why soft skills matter more than ever